Wednesday, June 13

Long talks..........shortest pauses

She was there for him, but not there actually. He would spend sleepless nights, think endlessly, and reach the same point..........."She is here for me, but not here actually."

Maik has trodden the same troublesome road, and lost in the commotion of emotions. Whither he now?

One moment he will say: "I will never talk about her from now onwards."
Long pause... Then he will say again: "I was thinking in the morning that what will come out of it. And kept on thinking while working." Then he will keep on talking about her.

"I don't want to talk about it any more." Came another assertion. Then for a short while, he will talk about something else with his mind stuck there.

These days he is thinking in two shades all the time and simultaneously. Work he has to do, and love, he cannot live without. Work supports his life, and love sustains his soul, which runs life in his physical existence.

"Do you know her mother called today........" Then he will start talking about his discussion with his would-be mother-in-law, while punctuating the whole talk with his lady's references in far superior affinity than what Bertrand Russell used to do with the punctuation marks. Less of words, more of punctuations, less of other's talk, more of hers.

"Yaar! Chaudhary Sahab! Leave this and lets talk about something else." And we will talk but for how long......shorter than the last sentence.

"How can she remain silent for these number of days?"......... Endless it will go.................Will stop for a short time..............And endless it will be again.......

"Can you tell me.........What is she thinking?" He will embark upon the same journey again....With same thoughts, same words, same feelings, and same resentment... With the same love, never letting himself forget her, forgive her, lose her and reject her.

Still he talks..........And talks to me only.........Never letting others know how the MDM thinks and feels about his life (read love).

Short life......Long talks.....Feeble promises.........Strong will.........He will conquer it all-over again....

As the fate has pre-ordained. Perhaps again........And certainly in certain ways

32 comments:

Anonymous said...

It seems that MDM is going through the toughest phase. I wonder how come he manage to live in two parts on daily basis? You say that he will conquer it again. I guess you are confident about him more than yourself.
It was indeed a beautiful note. Keep blogging.

Anonymous said...

Thank you very much for visiting the blog, and then appreciating the note as well.
Certain one never is about his own successes, but mostly about others'.
Coping with this situation, the MDM has developed habit of living in two parts.

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